Sunday, November 24

New Day , New Book , Run Away

By the name of ALLAH Most Merciful ,

today , i'm feeling so miserable , but i can handle it .
everything is going going gone and i really hate it ,
I really hate when people change , even though i've changed a lot ,
I hate when I have to pretend there's nothing wrong with me ,
because when I don't , people seem getting away from me , and it is so sucks.
So , here my new game ,
we play with denial ,
we deny that we sad ,
we deny that we love,
we deny that we like ,
we deny that we hurt so much and grieving like the hell inside.
we deny that everything turn bad,

well , my ex-boyfriend call joe already dumped me , well , it is so hard ,
err.. nope. it is so painful ..

okay , i start my day with going to college , sending my little sister to work . and then , talking talking with my friends and lecturer,, and here it goes , my day as student ,

after 5 , i prepare to go to kfc kl sentral , well , i am a multitasker , so , I did . part-time cashier ..

and then , of course I don't want to be the old myself that so so emotional .,
and i am so into my friends .
so . i am just being me ,

deny what I like ,, deny when I sad , and deny everything that i could,
and play with abandoned,
people there call me ira..

which is so good to hear and i really love it ..
what i have to do is only being a quiet person and bla bla bla

and , i hate assignments so much ,.and i mean it ,

okay .. and , my family will move on to Gombak soon ,

emmm , what else to say ?
I really hate Joe . i mean , i hate him because he choose someone else,
but I deserve better , rite ? am i right ?

so , may i have all the power to leave you . to make you as my memories ,
even though you were my soulmates ,

and hating you is the most exhausting ..

I have family to work on  , i have a really big responsibilities , and i have something to prove ,
so , i choose my life ,

may Allah take care of you yesterday darling ...


and .. talking about bestfriends , I don't know..  we've changed ,

so . may i can cope with what coming next ..
study , study and study ,

I wanna be a doctor , so i really have to heal myself first , then others,
i really have to ...

I want to be a doctor ..

it's a fardhu Kifayah man :)

and I really wish i can build a house for my father to keep gardening . my mother keep smiling.
my sisters and little khael keep swimming , and my havoc maksu can cook , cook and cook ..


I really have to pattern my lifestyle perfectly , I mean , near to perfectly.

Okay , Have a nice day readers . . .

May we got Jannah ..

:")